Phil & Mel In The Afternoon

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“Like, not everything has to be online, right?” -Zac Oyama, CollegeHumor

Truer words were never spoken, and yet that seems to be exactly what has happened. Almost anything you can or used to be able to do in real life, no matter how basic, is available on a website or an app. What makes it worse is the forced and completely unwarranted enthusiasm that often comes with it. No, I’m not blaming Millennials. This phenomenon started before most of them were born. But I do feel a “get off my lawn” moment coming on.

Justin Sullivan/Getty Images

Have you ever seen a website or gadget and said to yourself, “Does anybody really need this?” I have asked that question many times since the 1990s. Back then, dot-coms that had no discernible purpose or value were being sold for millions of dollars. I don’t fault anyone for making that money. Frankly, I’m jealous and disappointed that I didn’t figure out a way to cash in on the ’90s tech boom. A lot of people are making very nice livings finding solutions to non-existent problems.

These days, it might not be quite as easy to become an e-commerce millionaire. The competition is more formidable and the marketplace more selective. But there is still plenty of ridiculous stuff for sale on the web. CollegeHumor nailed it with their video entitled “Every Dumb Start-Up Ever,” featuring former Saturday Night Live cast member Bobby Moynihan.