Phil & Mel’s Favorite Fireworks (Sort Of)
The title of this blog post is a bit misleading. Neither Mel nor I are particularly enthused by fireworks. That’s probably because we each have two dogs and, as we all know, dogs don’t cotton to the booms and bangs of a 4th of July fireworks extravaganza. That being said, Mel and I get a huge kick out of the different brand names of fireworks. They are nothing short of hilarious.
I have read that part of the reason why we see such funny names on fireworks packaging is that most of them are manufactured in China and, while the names might make more sense over there, some things get lost in translation. Regardless of the reason, some of the names are perfect for the way they convey the ear-splitting havoc that’s about to be unleashed, as well as for their sheer comedic value. Here are the lists of our personal favorites:
Mel’s 15 Favorite Firework Names
- Anxiety Attack
- Back Off
- Big Fat Hissee Fit
- Bite Your Tushy
- Dirty Dancing in the Sky
- Grounds for Divorce
- Migraine
- Psycho Ex-Girlfriend
- The Punisher
- Redneck Ruckus
- Shotgun Wedding
- Squirrel!!!
- That’s Your Problem
- Wife’s Revenge
- Yikes
Phil’s 15 Favorite Firework Names
- American Intensity
- Braggin’ Rights
- Fight Fire with Fire
- Flirting with Greatness
- Forceful Movement
- Happy Clown Bomb
- How You Doing?
- Neighbor Hater
- One Bad Mother
- Pyro Viagra
- Toddler Tantrum
- Unnecessary B.S.
- Untamed Retribution
- Vengeful Texan
- Warm Greeting
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